Adventures of Matt and Pippa

Matt and Pippa Perkins DO London!!!!

Saturday, January 17, 2009

It finally happened... of the most embarrassing things that could ever happen to you, that maybe crosses your mind in particular situations as being possible to happen, but so cringeworthy and humiliating that you shrug it off and hope for the best. Yes, one of those moments happened to me, this week, on my 29th birthday. It is super funny but super embarrassing! It has to do with toilets. It's worse than leaving the ladies toilets in a public place with loo roll attached to your heel, or your dress tucked into your knickers. It's worse than doing a big poo on a toilet in a public place and not being able to flush the toilet afterwards.

So Matt and i were out for a birthday meal at one of my fave London restaurants, having a very pleasant time! At the end of the meal, before we were off to stroll around Hyde Park, Green Park and mayfair, i thought i should take the opportunity to use the public convenience, so off i went. It was a large and clean, minimalist space, very modern and agreeable! A bit like the toilets for disabled people, very spacious and with a pull outwards large door and 'lift up to lock' handle. So i lifted up to lock! And walked what seemed like a mile to sit down on the toilet, which now meant i was facing the door at the other end of the room.

As i was going about my business, i did hear a faint noise, like someone trying the door, but of course knew i had locked it so wasn't bothered in the slightest...until i heard the noise again and the door flew open to reveal a smartly dressed business man standing in front of me!
I shrieked, some might call it a scream, shouted "I'm on the toilet", as if he didn't know, and threw my hands down in front of me to conceal my front bottom!
By this time, in fact in the blink of an eye, the man, whose face i did not even see it all occurred so quickly, had gone back out, into the restaurant, shutting the door behind him. How considerate. I now faced the slight problem of waddling to the door speedily enough to LIFT THE LIFT TO LOCK HANDLE, though why i don't know as it clearly didn't work, and get out of the darn toilet, restaurant and local vicinity as soon as possible! My other slight concern was that i had no idea what this man looked like, but he sure knew what i looked like! I was now going to have to exit through the restaurant, probably past the poor man, and probably past his laughing friends who he's told, so i went back to our table where Matt was waiting, unaware of said trauma and put my bright coloured coat on with hood up to disguise myself. And we left. Quickly. With me looking in paranoia from left to right at those dining around us.

Yep - i think thats one of the most embarrassing situations that could happen - but heres the question - who should feel more embarrassed... the person who is happily using the public toilet, or the man who just walked in on her?


At 4:16 PM, Blogger OddBabble said...

hahahahahah! ahahahahah! *Takes breath* hahahahahahahahahah!

At 12:41 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

ahahahahaha! Never mind! It's worse being you fyi.

At 1:58 PM, Blogger Liz and Aaron said...

I love that story- I thought you where never going to blog again, So I am glad you did!

At 2:00 PM, Blogger Liz and Aaron said...

I love you story- I am glad to see you psted again - i thought you mihgt never post! I wish you better luck with your next bathroom experience! Until Sept. 2009- Love ya!!


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